The other day the head Shitshow flunky, that’s right the CEO, visited our site. This was a very important visit; it was his chance to show that he cared, that he was one of us, and that we really mattered. Of course this was done in pure Shitshow style.
In order to see the CEO speak you had to enter your name in the lottery where the Shitshow would select 20 regular employees to sit with the numerous number of regional flunky executive level managers. Imagine how special we all felt when we found out that out of the 5000+ minions, a whole 20 of us had the opportunity to see the CEO talk in person! For the 4980+ of us that weren’t selected? We could watch him talk on the intranet! What a treat! Of course, the winning 20 had a strict dress code to follow. After all, they were going to be in the eye sight of Shitshow royalty.
To make things even better, the corridors leading to the auditorium where the CEO was talking were blocked off and guarded by security. With the blockades in place, what is usually a 10 minute walk to cross campus turned into a 20 minute walk. Since this approach only inconvenienced common minions while protecting the CEO from seeing common folk, it was obviously justified.
Because minions are slapped with restraining orders when the CEO visits, I throw rocks.
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